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Friday, October 12, 2007

Patriarchal Blessings, Hawaiian Food, and Being Naughty

So I was having a sort of philosophical conversation with one of my dearest friends (I’ll call her Luisa) the other day and we started talking about our patriarchal blessings. She had been encouraging me to read mine to look for guidance and strength to deal with my moho issues. Just for background info- Luisa and I have been the best of friends since 6th grade. She was the one who was my primary connection to the church growing up. Midway through our senior year, she invited me to listen to the missionaries (I don’t remember if this was before or after I had come out) and she’s always been one of my greatest sources of inspiration and encouragement. Really, she's the bomb.com.

So I told Luisa about what had happened when I received my patriarchal blessing four years ago. I had only been a member for three months, but I already kind of knew what this business was about. I knew that I would find out about my tribe, my preparation for the priesthood and a mission, and of course about marriage and eternal companionship. So my patriarch proceeded to give me a very lengthy blessing- declaration of my tribe… check. Council concerning my preparations for the priesthood and a mission… check. And marriage… marriage… marriage? After the patriarch had been giving the blessing for a while and I knew that he had to be finishing up soon, he still hadn’t mentioned marriage or kids or eternal increase or anything like that. I was a little bit worried. Then he started what I knew had to be the finishing-up of the blessing! Oh no! Then he stopped abruptly and after a moment, awkwardly added in that I would find a companion at the right time. And then he finished. So thinking back and rereading my blessing, I wonder if this promise of
companionship is meant for this life or the next. I also pointed out to Luisa, half joking- half not joking, that the blessing never says “you will have a wife” or that I will “take a girl to the temple.” No- it just says “companion.”

So yesterday I met Brady and Gimple- my first moho friends! We just had dinner together at the Bamboo Hut (which is not an Asian restuarant :P) and it was awesome. Seriously, I can't remember when I've felt more like myself. I think that this is exactly what I need- I mean, I've kept everything bottled up ever since I joined the church- pretending, denying, and lying to myself about what I feel. I've been an emotional wreck since I came to Provo in January, but now I feel like things are looking up :)

And as for being naughty- I have a class with Luisa, and as I was settling into my desk before class started, she said, "Oh! You got a haircut!" This was an inaccurate observation; I just styled my hair a little differently today. But then she said, "Oh, well it goes really well with your unshaven face!" Then she told me, like, 10 times before class was over that I was breaking the honor code. I made the excuse that I didn't have time this morning- or yesterday morning- or the day before that.... okay- fine. I really don't like shaving. And I really don't like being a conformist (which sometimes makes being LDS pretty difficult) so maybe I don't always take the grooming standards of the honor code to heart. I'm actually lucky that I haven't had a professor say anything to me about it yet. I guess I just don't have a testimony about not having facial hair. Sometimes I miss my days in Seattle when I would wear pajama pants every day to school- even to my institute classes- and I didn't have to worry about sideways glances. So that's my rebellious side. I guess what I'm really trying to say is- Luisa, you know you love facial hair.

3 comments:

Brady said...

It was nice to meet you too! I'm glad we didn't scare you away from the Moho world! :)

My patriarchal blessing is rather short. But it covers all the basics. And it does say explicitly that I will find a woman to take to the temple and marry. And that I will be a father. But in the end, patriarchal blessings are like the scriptures... they say whatever you want them to say, it's all about interpretation. Okay, that sounds sort of apostate - but I mean it sincerely, there's a lot of room for interpretation with patriarchal blessings.

forever barred said...

So glad you have started meeting mohos. Isn't it awesome!

Abelard Enigma said...

Wow! Another Mormon convert (i.e. didn't grow up in the church), returned missionary, gay dude. There aren't many of us in the Mormon queerosphere. Welcome!