"I hope you're happy in the end"

I've been home for the holidays- it's so nice to be out of Utah for just a moment. I really can't stand living in Mormon central sometimes, but I suppose my attitude is partly to blame. Life's what you make it, after all (oh no- I think I just quoted a Hannah Montana song!). And to be honest, I actually am looking forward to returning to Provo; I've been a little lonely and feeling less than whole.

So, just like I promised myself, I talked to my dad this week about being gay. It went so much better than I had anticipated! First off, I came into the room and he was watching The Sound of Music- I couldn't have asked for a better backdrop for our conversation! I told him how I've been feeling and we talked a little about what may happen in the future. We actually did a lot of laughing and joking- it was just a normal conversation! My favorite part was when he smiled at me and told me that the 3 things that he hoped his children would never turn out to be was gay, Mormon, or drug addicts. 2 out of 3 for me- not bad :) I laughed and told him that's probably why he had me. He said that it's not what he would choose for me, but that I will always have his love and support and that he wants to see me settled and happy with whatever I choose to do. Today we went skiing with my brothers and everything was normal- I'm not acting like anything but myself and he's not treating me any differently. I feel so blessed!

The last three months have changed my life completely- "Who can say if I've been changed for the better? I do believe I have been changed for the better... and because I knew you, I have been changed for good..."
I feel so much more authentic than I used to! "I- I feel so alive- for the very first time, and I think I could fly!" Sorry- sometimes I can't stop the lyrics.

I'm so excited for this year! I feel like God is guiding me into the beginning of a life full of wonderment and happiness.

"I hope you're happy,
now that you're choosing this...
I hope it brings you bliss,
I really hope you get it
and you don't live to regret it-
I hope you're happy in the end-
I hope you're happy my friend...

"So if you care to find me
look to the western sky!
As someone told me lately,
everyone deserves a chance to fly!

"And if I'm flying solo,
at least I'm flying free!
To those who'd ground me,
take a message back from me-
Tell them how I am defying gravity!
I'm flying high defying gravity,
and soon I'll match them in renown!
And nobody in all of Oz,
no wizard that there is or was,
is ever gonna bring me down!"

Of the Devil

I know that my last post was about tolerance, however, there are certain things that are absolutely intolerable. The following is possibly the strongest philosophical argument that I have come up with to date. I want to address one of the most serious sins that Mormons commit- and if you have committed this sin then you automatically lose 100 points. I’m talking about the plague of plagues- that disgusting practice called scrapbooking. What? You think it’s harmless? Oh, oh- you have been deceived! Here is my unshakeable proof to show you how scrapbooking is of the Devil.

1) At least 95 percent of scrapbooking is kitschy (for those who are unfamiliar with this word, it basically connotes tackiness, suckiness, ugliness, doilyness, and granny decorationsness).

2) Scrapbooking is a waste of time. You could be playing with your children, spending time with your family, reading a good book, or alphabetizing your soups; pretty much anything is more productive. Why spend hours on end kitsching up your photo album when you and your posterity will almost never look at it. I see no problem with keeping a regular photo album- it’s nice to look back on happy times- but seriously, is decorating your album going to make the memories any happier. No. If anything it will just kitschify your memories.

3) Scrapbooking is a waste of money. Someone could start a college fund for their child with the amount they spend on scrapbooking.

4) Satan wants us to waste our time, waste our money, our talents, and he likes kitschy things.

5) Therefore, Satan wants you to do scrapbooking (!).

“But people like my scrapbooks!” you might say. They’re just lying to you. When you pull out the scrapbook to show to your poor guests, you think you’re sharing memories with them. But at the same time you’re implicitly saying, “Here, hold this waste-of-time book for a while and look at all the kitschyness.” And if the person is not a scrapbooker, they say, “Okay- wow, this is pretty fancy!” They are really thinking, “Okay- wow, this person sure wasted a lot of time on this kitschy book.” If the person is a fellow scrapbooker, then they’re really thinking, “Oh, I hope my scrapbook is cooler than this one. If it’s not then it’s off to Scrapbook Heaven to load up on ribbons and kitty cat stickers!”

See? Satan likes people to scrapbook. It also causes other people to waste their time. Now I’m not saying that scrapbooking is damnable (though I wouldn’t be surprised if the issue came up in General Conference), but I’m almost positive that all your scrapbooks are going to hell- where they belong! Sorry.